Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer::A modern retelling.
Ever since Golfer called out the bogus nature of the point of the Rudolf story, I’ve been thinking about that reindeer, his red nose, his “friends”, his family, and the elves. I’ve wondered what the story would be if it were set in modern times. And I think I have the answer! So here we go…a perfect little morality tale, based loosely on the old stop motion TV show, to accompany this Christmas Eve day.
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Once upon a time there was a reindeer who was born with a glowing red nose. His father, Santa’s lead reindeer Donner, feels ashamed. Soon, it’s time for Rudolf to go to reindeer school. The teacher notices that Rudolf isn’t like all the other reindeer. He’s not as coordinated as the others. He’s interested in other things and doesn’t pay a lot of attention to what’s going on around him. Instead of playing reindeer games, Rudolf just wants to fly…it’s hard for him to stay still because he keeps trying to take off. Everyone teases him because he’s different. And then there’s the issue of his nose. He’s bullied because of it. Instead of helping the other reindeer accept Rudolf for who he is, the teacher calls a conference and sends Donner to the elves, who tell him that they’ve been working on a pill that will fix everything. His mother doesn’t see anything wrong with Rudolf’s nose, but wants to make everyone happy and so goes along with it. How bad could it be?
Rudolf takes the pill every day. It stops him from caring about flying so much, so he’s OK that the reindeer school schedule focuses more on reindeer games. It makes his nose stop glowing! It stops his brain from thinking so much, so it looks like he’s paying attention when really he’s not thinking much at all. He stops being interested in things the other reindeer don’t care about. He begins to look and act just like the other reindeer. This makes his dad, Donner, really happy. Now he’s not embarrassed by how different his son is, and doesn’t have to listen to the teasing anymore. This gives him hope that maybe now Rudolf can be successful doing things reindeer are supposed to be successful doing, instead of anything else.
Christmas Eve comes around, and a big thick fog rolls in. Santa and all the reindeer on the sled team start panicking…how will they see enough to get through the fog to all the houses? Santa remembers there used to be a reindeer with a glowing red nose. “Hm, that would be useful right about now!” he thinks. He walks around asking “Where’s the reindeer with the glowing red nose?!” Rudolf steps forward and says, “I used to have a glowing nose!” but when he tries to make it glow, he realizes he can’t anymore.
Santa brainstorms and thinks that maybe if he takes a few more reindeer up with him to pull the sleigh, more eyes will be able to help guide it. Unfortunately, the reindeer curriculum emphasizes flying in the second year, so none of the younger reindeer are capable or strong flyers yet since they studied mostly reindeer games. Rudolf briefly remembers how much he wanted to fly, and how frustrated he was when everyone stopped him. “Maybe I could have helped out more with my glowing red nose and advanced flying skills,” he thought. “Now I’m just like all the other reindeer, but right now we need something different.”
Santa had to cancel Christmas. The world was sad, and lost faith in the North Pole. Everyone started taking care of Christmas themselves, and demand dropped for elf toys. Soon Santa had to lay off half the elf workforce and 1/3 of the reindeers. Donner was the first reindeer he let go.
Eventually, Rudolf became old enough to make his own choices, so he stopped taking the pills the elves gave him, regained the use of his red glowing nose, and flew away to find others that were unique like him. He subsequently finds the island of misfit toys and becomes the CEO of the toymaking factory there. They make such special and whimsical toys, demand for them skyrockets throughout the world. Rudolf starts hiring Santa’s laid off elves. Within 2 years he puts Santa out of business and they merge companies, with Rudolf remaining in charge of both.
After embracing who he is, and finding others who do the same, Rudolf lives happily ever after.
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1 Comment
Loved it Tiff!