2 Things Never To Buy At Target.

Posted by Tiff in Momsanity, Uncategorized | 4 comments

I know this week is all about getting what we want. Step one of embracing a freaking awesome freeplaylife starts with figuring out what we want/need and then speaking it. I hope you all have stood up for your needs like ninjas so far! A bunch of us are having a party over at Pinterest by creating a “What I Want” category and filling it with everything we think is awesome.

Sometimes, though, when we get something that we want we realize it’s not what we want at all. That’s OK, it’s part of the process. It’s better to live and learn than to opt out altogether in fear that we’ll make the wrong choice! Carpe the fucking diem, bitches!

Except for these two things from Target. Never ever make my mistake and get these things that you see in my pan. Which would be this style bra and spatula.

I used to get my bras from Victoria Secret and Frederick’s. And then I had kids, my boobs deflated, and I realized I could outfit all 3 kids in clothes for an entire season for the price I’d pay for 5 bras. Sooooo, Target it is! Which is usually not a problem except these cute colorful ones are no bueno. For some reason, my nipples keep popping out. Being as small as I am, I’ve never had this issue before. I mean, busty cannot be used to describe my chest and nipples popping out is an entirely new thing. It’s waaaaaay annoying. I’ve talked with other women that I know shop at Target to see if they’ve gotten these bras and if they have a nipple problem in them and they all do. I’m thinking there’s gotta be a class action lawsuit we can file. In any case, do not buy cute colorful bras like this unless you are well versed in tucking-nipple-back-in.

And while you’re avoiding that, by all means avoid all Giada De Laurentis cookware. It’s super cute and super colorful, and it looks innocent enough. It’s also coated with something that keeps it from scraping the hell out of nonstick pans. Which is why I got this spatula. However, note that while the bottom is coated, the handle is metal. All the cookware is like this! I didn’t notice it until the first time I touched it after leaving it resting in the pan while the eggs cooked. When I picked it back up again after a minute, I had a nice burn waiting for me on the part that grabbed hold of it. If you think this kept me from making the same lean it against the pan/pick it up and get burned mistake, you’d be wrong. I pretty much do it every day. There was probably a lawsuit potential there if I would have stopped after the first burn, but now that it’s a habit I’m too embarrassed to draw attention to myself. In any case, save yourself a burn and get a handle that is insulated.

Now that you have room in your cart, all is not lost. If you have a kick ass Target around you like I do (it’s basically a full bar with housewares and groceries attached) then you’ll be able to find juice boxes for moms (and dads!).

As the comments over on the facebook page informed me, these special juice boxes are great to take places where full wine bottles aren’t very convenient…luggage, movies, horrible Nick Jr. live theatre, beach, pools, playgrounds, church…

So there you go. Live and learn. Sometimes we get things that we need and they are awesome! Sometimes we get things that we think we want and they end up exposing our nipples to the free world. If you don’t try, though, you’ll never know and you’ll miss out on some pretty great shit.

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